So this year has been a whirlwind and my blogging status went from sporadic to non-existent! However with less than 100 days to go its time to wind down, check in with myself and begin the journey into motherhood.
I am not good at relaxing and winding down. I know this may sound strange coming from a yoga teacher however they do say you teach best what you need the most! I have always struggled with being still and content. I am a naturally motivated person who is always pushing towards an end goal.
Over the next few months my only end goal is to be in a relaxed, happy and good place to give birth to a beautifully happy baby. After that it will be taking every day as it comes for a while….this is not going to come naturally for me!
Currently I am busy with my day job, organising yoga cover, my accounts, finishing yoga course work etc. All in an effort to be able to switch off in September and concentrate on myself. I like a project so although I am a little stressed I am also in my element. Where I am uncomfy is with the suddenly opened up evenings where I would be usually throwing back my dinner and heading straight out after work to go and teach. I now have spare time, time to read, watch TV, have a bath, even have a nap!
However does this seem familiar to you?
Get home…sit down….try to relax….
Brain kicks in……
‘what you doing, shouldn’t you be doing something? Isn’t there work that needs to be doing? You should really finish those accounts! Have you rang your friends recently? Or your mum? The house is a bit dirty…you should clean! Don’t watch TV its a waste of time…you should be reading a yoga book…put that magazine down!!…..guilt guilt guilt!
I am told that guilt comes second nature to mums so perhaps I am more prepared than I think. That said I don’t intend to spend the rest of my life always thinking I should be doing something else! I want to be in the present, I want to put self-care high on my list so I can be a better teacher, wife, friend and mother! This is my challenge! And I intend to share anything I learn on the way!